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God save me from myself.
In order to overcome addiction we must start with self because the struggle lies within the individual. It is not the drug that is the root to our addiction. OrealE? Yes “Oh Real-ly!” It is our own behaviors that impact our drug use.
Drug addicts suffer with addictive personalities which are reinforced by behaviors we’ve developed through negative or positive life experiences, mental disorders, emotional or physical trauma, physical or sexual abuse, and peer pressure. For some the use of drugs started as a way to escape their own realities. Many have a need to fit in or belong to something other than what they’re use to. Some have dealt with physical or traumatic events and have decided to medicate the pain of these events. Others are born into circumstance with addicted parents, relatives, and friends they have observed “enjoying” life through addictive eyes or more realistically “suffering” in which many addicts accept to be normal.
Why do we use drugs? We use drugs to medicate or numb a feeling that we don’t like. There are four primary feelings: sadness, happiness, fear, and anger—plus one more: numb. Anyone that does not feel anything actually feels numb. This is the feeling that most addicts chase to escape the other four. In order to change this behavior we must change our way of thinking because our way keeps us in crisis.
Here are 10 ways to change your thinking and change your behaviors.
- Let the things in your past go and/or work on them.
- Build new relationships through new friends and networks.
- Get a sponsor.
- Go to meetings every day.
- Get a job.
- Stay busy.
- Be open and share what your feelings are.
- Never forget the pain and suffering you experienced and caused.
- Set goals.
- Understand that recovery is a lifelong commitment.
If you keep these things bottled up inside you will continue to give yourself reason to use. Get out of your head by not allowing your negative thoughts to dictate your actions.
You cannot continue to be around the same old people, places, and things and think that you will remain clean and sober. If you run into an old using buddy say high and bye all in the same sentence then keep it moving. If you end up with their phone number throw it away immediately.
A sponsor is someone that is in recovery and has multiple years of clean time. Who is better than another drug addict to push you to do the right things? You know you can’t just say anything nor do anything to someone that understands you.
One of the primary reason people in recovery relapse is because they stop going to meetings. You need addiction support groups to share your feelings or reservations that we call lapse. Lapse is the thought of using. Also you may hear in someone elses story the message that can help you get back on the right track.
A job allows you to be responsible. It also helps you keep busy during the day. Go to a meeting at night. OrealE? Yes “Oh Real-ly!” There are meetings at night. Idle time is a trigger to return to drug abuse.
Find positive things to do. We all have hobbies or positive things that we enjoy doing. Jogging, a walk through the park, toss a football in the backyard with your kid, play with your pet, or play an instrument are some of the things that you can do that will help you feel good about yourself and remain focused on doing the next right thing.
It will make you feel better to get things off your chest. Don’t say that you don’t have anyone to talk to. It will amaze you who is willing to listen to you. The little lady waiting for a bus will amaze you with how intently she will listen to you and the advice that she will give. So be open to feedback and talk to someone–anyone.
Many lose focus on their recovery after they have some clean time behind them. Don’t get cocky. Remember not going to meetings is the primary reason that people in recovery relapse. Besides the pain and suffering you experienced did not just impact you. It also
impacted your loved ones: son, daughter, wife, husband, mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, aunt, uncle, brother, sister, etc.
You must continue to do things that will keep you moving forward. Set small attainable goals. You don’t want to repeat the same self-destructive behaviors that led to your addiction problems. Learn to live life normally. That means keep things simple.
You are never cured of your addiction. There is no cure. The only remedy to your addiction is abstinence. How do you remain abstinent? You keep people in your life that are going to keep their foot on your neck, you build relationships with positive people in recovery, you speak about your problems, you attend NA/AA meetings, you establish a sponsor and a network, you work the 12 Steps, and you take your recovery one day at a time.
Source: NA Meeting Locator | Maryland AA | AA Locator | HBO: Addiction
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Good tips. Building healthy relationships was key in my recovery. Those friends have help me always. It’s good to have people who love you and who want to see you become well. That’s a big one.
They encourage when you want to give up and celebrate milestones as they come. They are with you: friends. Get a few. Three is plenty.